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Page 9


  Kenny, it dawned on her ... Brian’s best friend. She knew it would happen eventually; she just hadn’t expected him to find out so quickly. It had been a year, and Brian simply couldn’t accept the fact it was over between them. Panic paralyzed her. What if they’d hurt Jordan?

  Jordan threw the truck into drive and peeled out of the parking lot in the opposite direction of Starbucks. She didn’t utter a word as he drove down Highway 19 entirely too fast. Instead, she buckled up. He was furious. Why? Was he mad at her?

  Jordan flashed a glance in the mirror, then changed lanes. He turned his fiery gaze back to her. “You can’t go back there.”

  She flinched away from his hostile expression. “My ... car ...” she stammered. She didn’t understand. What was he implying?

  “We’ll get your vehicle tomorrow, but you can’t return to work there. They’ll come back, Jaynee. It’s what dirt bags like them do. They’re like sharks ... once they’ve tasted blood —” He clenched his jaw as his hands tightened on the steering wheel.

  She could see he was having a difficult time staying composed, but still... “I can’t quit my job!” Who the heck did he think he was? She glowered at him in the darkness.

  Jordan ignored her response; obviously, she didn’t understand. She couldn’t fathom how much he already cared about her.

  This wasn’t how the night was supposed to go. He didn’t want to make her angry. How could he explain she didn’t need to work ... that he’d take care of her forever. He couldn’t. This wasn’t how he wanted to go about this.

  He pulled into the parking area of his hotel. Without saying a word, he jumped out and walked around to Jaynee’s side of the truck. Instead of opening the door, she just sat there, waiting — for what he wasn’t sure.

  Irritated, he pulled the remote out of his pocket, clicked unlock, and then opened the door. He offered her his hand. “Please, Jaynee,” he pleaded, “I apologize if I scared you. And I was too upset to go anywhere, so I figured I just come here.” He worked to keep his tone light. It wasn’t easy. Fire radiated through his veins. He could have killed those thugs. He wanted to, but he was a cop. And cops were supposed to uphold the law. For the first time in his life, he wished he wasn’t an officer.

  She glared down from the truck at his waiting arms, but made no effort to move.

  A crinkle appeared between her eyes, something she did when she was confused or frustrated. He wondered which it was. “You didn’t frighten me. Why would you think I was afraid of you? I’m mad at you. There’s a difference.” She crossed her arms over her chest.

  “I’m sorry. Let me help you down from the cab, please.”

  She turned toward him muttering something about, “ridiculously high truck,” but allowed him to help her.

  Jordan reached into the glove box and pulled out the plastic bag with the discreet little box. Tonight may not be the right time, but he didn’t want to leave the ring in the truck for some thief to abscond with it. Jaynee didn’t seem to pay him any attention or wasn’t curious in the least at what was in the sack.

  He wrapped his arm around her waist, directing her across the parking lot. She shrugged off his touch, but continued walking forward. She didn’t appear uneasy about coming to his room, but she was clearly irritated by his remark.

  They walked through the lobby in silence. After entering the elevator, he pressed the button for the fourth floor.

  “Sorry it’s not fancier,” he said, breaking the silence when the elevator door shut. “I wasn’t anticipating company.” She said nothing, so he continued, “On business trips I just pick a popular hotel chain close to my area of work.” She looked up at him then. He could see she was still angry, but a hint of a smile lifted just the corner of her mouth.

  Jaynee tried to remain indignant, but found this small revelation pleasant. The majority of men she met came to Florida only to party. Jordan hadn’t even picked a hotel on the beach. He really was here just to help.

  “I’m glad ... I mean ... I’m happy you weren’t expecting company,” she confessed.

  Jordan led her out of the elevator and down the hall. He held open the hotel door, and she entered the room, wondering what the hell she was thinking.

  Although she wanted Jordan last night and this morning, her home had felt safer. The thought of entering his hotel room, on the other hand, had her feeling a little anxious. What would she do if he became aggressive? She closed her eyes, pondering how she always got herself into these predicaments. No matter how much her brain screamed for her to run, though, her heart wouldn’t listen. Something told her Jordan was different. She couldn’t leave.

  As soon as he walked into the room, he went to the tiny refrigerator and pulled out two sodas and a couple packets of crackers. “Did you eat? You should eat something. I can order a pizza or something else. What do you like?” He rattled off the words as if he were in a rush, then walked over to the dresser and pulled out a large t-shirt. “Your shirt is ripped. I’d rather you not go back to your place if that’s okay with you. Those scumbags have been stalking you, and they know where you live. Feel free to use whatever you want in the bathroom if you want to fix those scrapes on your arm.” He tossed the shirt on the bed and turned away from her, walking toward the window.

  He was agitated and evidently needed to relax too. Why did he think they were stalking her? Why wouldn’t he have thought that it was a random act? She decided not to ask. Jaynee just stared at him, not sure what to say. She felt completely comfortable with Jordan but couldn’t help but be cautious about the situation. He hadn’t pressured her with anything; he was simply offering her something she didn’t understand. She was so accustomed to people taking from her. She didn’t know what to do when someone was willing to give without expectation of anything in return.

  “I’m not hungry,” she finally said, then picked up his shirt and headed off toward the bathroom before he could respond.

  Once inside the bathroom, she decided to take a shower. Steaming hot water poured over her body, dissolving the grime and filth she felt from those degenerates’ attack. He’d called her Caycee and had asked about the letter she’d discarded. Brian obviously sent Kenny to intimidate her.

  They wouldn’t have hurt her ... she knew indisputably. Brian was many things, but he’d never laid a hand on her, and she was sure he’d kill whoever did. Those barbarians were only there to frighten her. She now wondered what was in the letter. No, she decided immediately ... she didn’t care.

  She would let go of her past. She would never open another letter or cry another tear over her ex, her mother, or even her father for that matter. She would tell Jordan everything. If he still wanted her, great. If not, she’d still let it go. She was tired of shouldering her past. It felt like a horse collar weighing her down.

  She hadn’t had feelings for Brian in years anyway. He’d destroyed everything the first time she discovered he’d cheated. Tolerating drugs and alcohol had been stupid enough, but she’d never stay with a man who didn’t care enough to be faithful.

  Jordan stared out the window, attempting to control his emotions.

  He contemplated having a drink to settle his nerves. It’d been so long since he’d had more than a few sips of alcohol, though, so he wasn’t sure how he’d react. The last thing he wanted was to be undisciplined around Jaynee. He wanted her to trust him. He needed her to believe in love.

  As he thought about Jaynee, he realized she was the only drug he needed. Already his adrenaline had slowed, replaced by a different sensation. He envisioned her walking out of the bathroom in his t-shirt, hair wet, smelling fresh and clean, and then she would lie in his arms all night. He imagined they were already married, and it was just another night. How he hoped it could turn out that way. What he wouldn’t do to have her in his arms every night for the rest of his life. Yes, he definitely felt better.

  He quickly changed out of his jeans into shorts. He reached for a t-shirt, but then realized he’d given Jaynee his la
st one, his favorite one, his Van Halen concert shirt. The band wasn’t expected to tour again for a while; he hoped he wouldn’t lose it. It would look ridiculous if he dressed in a polo or oxford shirt, so he opted for nothing. He’d stopped her last night and this morning when she’d tried to unbutton his shirt, so he hoped she wouldn’t think he was being forward. But an even larger desire was that she would appreciate what she would see.

  Jordan stretched back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, waiting for her return, not knowing what would happen when she came out of the bathroom. Naturally, he knew what he wanted to occur; he was a man after all. The question was...What was the right thing to do? He’d turned his life around a few years ago and had not been with a woman since. It hadn’t been an issue. He’d never wanted a woman the way he yearned for Jaynee.

  No doubt, he wanted to make love to her, but he would be the gentleman she needed tonight and let her set the pace.

  Chapter Eight

  Jaynee stepped out of the bathroom. The shower had definitely helped her feel better.

  Jordan was lying on the bed, his hands folded behind his head. He’d changed his clothes and was wearing just a pair of cargo-style shorts. His chest was broad and muscular, and she could see the outline of his abdominal muscles. Not only was he beautiful on the inside, but he also had an awesome body, and she felt warm inside just looking at him. He was just staring at the ceiling, not even watching TV. He looked over at her as she started across the room. His eyes widened, and his mouth lifted into a heart throbbing smile. His good mood had definitely returned.

  “Well, that shirt has never looked better, and without a doubt, you’re more beautiful every time I see you. Why do you even bother putting on makeup when you look so incredible coming out of the shower?”

  Her cheeks warmed, and she wondered if he’d notice or if he’d assume that she’d taken too hot of a shower.

  He held out his arms for her to come to him, an irresistible request. Her feelings seemed to change directly in response to his. No longer angry about his earlier demand that she shouldn’t return to work, she walked over to the bed and allowed him to pull her into his warm embrace.

  “And you smell ... Mmm ... good enough to eat.” He groaned lightly, quickly rolling her onto her back, supporting his weight above her. He pressed his lips against hers with more fervor than the last time they’d kissed, and she felt the burning need in him as his breaths quickened.

  She pulled him down on top of her, letting the weight of his body overtake her as she ran her hands over his shoulders and down his back. He was strong; she liked that.

  He pulled back a few inches from her face and locked his steel-blue eyes with hers. “Are you ready to give me all of you, or just your body?” His velvety voice stroked her soul as if he’d reached in and brushed the very essence of her being.

  She wasn’t sure exactly what he asking, but at the moment, she didn’t care. She wanted him ... all of him. “I’m ... ready,” she whispered, breathless. Her heart was tapping out such a vicious rhythm in her chest that she found it difficult to speak.

  He continued to drill his gaze ... as though he could read her thoughts. “Are you positive? Heart and soul, nothing less. I won’t accept anything less than everything. You don’t have to tell me all that has happened, but you can’t keep anything from me from this moment forward. You will have to submit everything and be willing to be loved completely, and I promise you, I’ll do the same.”

  Submit everything? The thought scared her, but she wanted him in her life — somehow. “I’m willing,” she gasped. Her heart swelled in her chest. She wanted to believe she could trust him and truly wanted to feel loved by Jordan.

  He lowered his head, and his warm breath caressed her neck. “Tell me, Jaynee. Tell me what you want.”

  “You ...” Her blood raced through her veins as he trailed a line of kisses up her throat, continuing along her jaw.

  “I need more, Jaynee. Everything, heart and soul, remember? Tell me.” His whispered words sounded like pleas. He wanted her too.

  “Please, Jordan, I want you.” The words rushed out of her. He was what she wanted. It had been too long since she’d felt anything.

  His mouth was hot over her lips again, kissing off her words. His kisses moved up her jaw to her ear again. “I love you, Jaynee. Are you ready for my love? There’s no turning back.”

  His breathing increased as his lips moved back and forth along the line of her jaw, waiting and anticipating.

  Her hands smoothed over his broad shoulders and traced the lines of his biceps. Dear heavens she wanted him. Why was he toying with her? “Yes, Jordan, I want all of you.” She did, more than she’d ever imagined was possible. She needed to feel again, and he was doing just that. He was opening up a well she thought had run dry.

  He trailed kisses up her throat again as his fingers grazed her neck. “Open your eyes, Jaynee.” She did, and she witnessed the burning in his. “Don’t you know what I want?”

  She slowly moved her head back and forth, unable to form a coherent response. He teased her with his tongue as he moved his mouth back over hers, his lips moving on hers as he spoke between his kisses.

  “Tell me, Jaynee. I want to know what you’re feeling. I need to hear you say it aloud.”

  She tried to pull him closer, but he was stronger and held himself suspended over her. “Make love to me, Jordan. Now, please.”

  His breathing was ragged, but he pulled back abruptly. “That’s not what I need to hear. I love you, Jaynee, but you’re not ready to make love to me.”

  He rolled onto his back, pulling her with him. His fingertips caressed her lips, then brushed lightly over her cheekbones. Excitement burned in his eyes, but she could tell he wouldn’t continue. He wasn’t going to make love to her. What happened? How could he stop so easily?

  “I am ready, Jordan. Why did you stop?”

  He brushed her hair over her shoulder. “Jaynee ... did you hear me? Did you hear me even once? I love you, and I want you, but I don’t want to just have sex. I want all of you. Don’t you understand?”

  She lowered her gaze, shaking her head. She didn’t understand. If he loved her, why didn’t he want to make love to her? Suddenly, she felt like a harlot.

  He nudged up her chin and kissed her softly. “I’m sorry, love. It’s not that I don’t want you. Believe me, I do. But, there’s no turning back for me. When we make love, it’ll be because you love me firstly, and then because you want me. Not the opposite. I know it’s soon, and I’m sorry if I’m scaring you.” He sighed. “It’s just — from the little bit you’ve told me ... that everyone has hurt you ... I don’t want to be on that list. I don’t want to take advantage of you like everyone else in your life. I want all of you. Can’t you see that, Jaynee?” His eyes melted into hers as if trying to prove his words.

  She gazed back astonished, not certain how to respond. She’d heard him say it, but wasn’t sure he’d really meant it. Hadn’t she heard in all the songs and in movies where men said they loved a girl just to get her in the sack? Did she love Jordan? She believed so, but couldn’t say it now, just to get him to sleep with her. How ironic. She’d worried that he would attempt to sleep with her, when repeatedly it was her endeavoring to seduce him.

  “Jordan, I —”

  He shushed her gently with his fingertips. “You don’t have to say anything, Jaynee. It’s enough to have you here in my arms. You will fall in love with me. I promise.” He embraced her tightly, and she knew he was right. How could she not be in love with Jordan? He was the most incredible man she’d ever met. If she could only release herself, let go of the past. Maybe she could believe.

  Jordan watched Jaynee as she slept in his arms. She was beautiful, kind, smart ... everything he’d ever sought after and more. And she loved him; he could see it in her eyes. He was confident she would be his bride, but first she had to admit she was in love with him.

  Would she be okay moving to North Carolina,
changing colleges, and the hardest part, leaving her grandmother? It was the logical choice. He had a career, business, and home to return to in Charlotte.

  He stroked her silky-smooth curls and exposed arms. Her skin had a natural glow, the epitome of a native Floridian. Would she miss her state?

  It wasn’t as though she was happy here. She’d hinted numerous times the only thing positive in her life was her grandmother. He wondered how he was going to get her to confess her troubled past. He’d been honest when he said he didn’t care. She didn’t have to tell him, but he ached to take away the pain. He drifted off to sleep holding her securely in his arms, hoping she would recognize her feelings and tell him what he needed to hear.

  Sudden movement and muffled groans woke him up. The soft light of the alarm clock cast a red hue on Jaynee’s face, and he could see her eyes dart under her lids. She was dreaming.

  “No! Please don’t!” Jaynee’s cries broke the silent air, and then desperate mumblings with more pleadings emerged from her lips, but her eyes remained closed.

  Jordan shook her gently. “Jaynee, wake up.” He hated that she was in pain, even in her dream. “Jaynee, love ... you’re having a nightmare.” She continued to plead for something to stop. “Caycee!” he said louder, watching gratefully as her eyes popped open. “It’s okay ... I’m here. You’re okay.” He caressed her hair and arms to calm her. She didn’t utter another word and drifted right back asleep.

  It was quiet again; only the whir of the air conditioner filled the room. It didn’t matter how peaceful it was; he wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep. The nightmare and scream had been unexpected. What had she lived through that frightened her so much? He wondered if she’d remember the dream. He’d wanted to ask her about it, but perhaps that would startle her just as much. She certainly wasn’t accustomed to a man in her bed.

  Since he wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep, he lay there pondering how he would ask her to marry him and whether he could really deal with not knowing her past. He couldn’t come up with anything original because he wasn’t familiar with the area and didn’t know what she would like.